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How to Save a Relationship.... CONCLUDING PART

Part 3 of 3: Reconnecting

  1. 1
    Find a new interest to pursue together. You need to make your old relationship feel fresh, and one way to do it is to find something completely new that you and your significant other can do together so that you feel like you're slowly crawling out of your relationship rut.
    • You can even just find a new TV show to obsess over; though it's a small step, watching it every week will give you something to look forward to, and you can cuddle while you watch.
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    • Find a new hobby to do together. Take a dance, painting, or even a karate class, and have fun improving your skills together every week.
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    • If you're the brainy types, start your own book club. Read a new book every month and meet over dinner to discuss it.
    • Get physical together. Go to the gym, hike, or take walks together to get your blood pumping as you reconnect.
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    2
    Make time for romance. Plug "date night" into your schedules, and make sure that you both look nice, smell nice, and feel great before you set out together. You should try something new every week on your date nights, and make time to cuddle and let each other know how much you mean to each other. No matter how busy you are, you should always make time to put that spark back into your dwindling flame.
    • Write each other sweet notes telling each other how you feel at least once a week. Leave them in unexpected locations.
    • Part of making time for romance means putting the passion back into lovemaking -- make an effort to make love more often, to try new things, and to make love because you really want to, not because you have to check it off your to-do list.
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    3
    Go on a trip. Though a vacation isn't a good long-term solution for any relationship, it can be a great way to get a new perspective on your love, to find your passion in a new environment, and just to get out of your own heads. Go on the trip that you've been wanting to take forever, or just take a quick weekend-long getaway to clear your heads.
    • Try a completely exotic location. The more out of your comfort zones you feel, the more you'll rely on each other.
    • If you take a long vacation, you can reconnect just by sitting down and planning all of the fun things you'll do when you get there.
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    4
    Do something that you loved to do together. Though tastes may change, you should make time to do something you used to love doing together, no matter how silly it may be. If you used to love cooking Chinese food together, try it again. If you had once trained for a half marathon but are now feeling too out of shape, commit to the challenge.
    • Maybe you just loved to go to your favorite bar once a week to split a pitcher of beer and play pool. Whatever it is, try it again to see how it feels.
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    5
    Take a trip down memory lane. Take some time to look through old photos, talk about old memories, or even laugh about the crazy people you used to know. If you have a favorite band that you haven't heard in a while, play your favorite songs. See if you can have fun quizzing each other on the random memories you both shared.
    • Go through an old box of mementos and talk about all the fun you used to have.
    • Read old emails that you used to send each other when you were feeling more passionate.
    • If you're really feeling nostalgic, take a trip to the place where you first met, or visit some of your old haunts. This will make you feel misty-eyed about your old love.
  6. 6
    Start something new. Going down memory lane and doing all of the things you loved to do can help you reconnect, but in the end, you can't just draw on the past and have to work on making a new future together. Visualize the people you want to be, both individually and together, and work toward building a new relationship that draws on all of the old things that did work while addressing the things that failed.

2 comments:

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